all my poetry/songs [27 Feb 2008|07:56pm] -Splint- relentless, sauntering past placing gaunt fingers onto raw flesh slowly began to press hissing with pain released frail skin shifting away thrusting a narrow wrist simplistic, proceeding to twist perceiving a faint gaze fought back the tears blurry eyes so unclear gushing rivers sting acrid lips belligerent against the piercing grip propelling restlessly retaining lingering pain rushing tears and blood, distain thirsty for freedom full of rage trapped inside this revolting cage feed me a remedy rid this stint taunt dysfunction to be a glint ------- -Drowned Beauty- Riding through a shower of sun drops Raw Ice Slice my ribs Blue rose thorns puncture amethyst lips Radiant ruby disembogue, drips Barbed-wire fence cuts into a rigid Spine Entangled beauty lingers inside Pool of Sapphire Ocean of Needles Soaring mountains of frost Distorted diamonds dazzle Falling angels Thick pyres emerge Pouring rain results in deepened wounds Lost, echo's of fragile cerulean sustain Chains of jaded emerald remain Vague dreams of honey Gilded thoughts written in stone Anticipating one last ivory gaze An iridescent glimpse and its gone -Echoing Gyration- Tasting steaming water escaping from the corners of parched lips Windows open Hearing sounds of angelic music playing three houses down Ascending the window running through wet grass spinning around fluttering butterflies stopping so fast I lay upon the ground Bleeding wounds cover my knees It doesn't matter now I will do as I please eyes blinded head still skittish Starting again what I have just finished Memories spiral downward into the ground Wondering, "How do they progress without making a sound?" ___ -Natural Born Life- In a world of ice Dwell thousands of torrid reveries In a land of plague Linger millions of bliss redemptions Beings of scarlet flesh and milky bones intersperse this earth with divergent dogmas initiating persistent hostility Displaying chalked spirits on a slate of sin Faded intoxication Lie beneath an innocent angel's skin An essence flaunts a solitary thread Prodigal blood shed Pray for the faces that may one day launch a thousand dreams Maker of rain Catch a bloody tear from the boundless sky Goddess of sun Bare your golden candle on which we rely -Joven- Young child don't cry When your world starts to fall I will be here to catch you I heard it was sixes and sevens up there in your heaven Gelid ocean water was all you could feel No worries Those wounds are going to heal Observing grains of vanilla descend from a glass wall Bruises raw in a sea of revulsion Suffocating in a bed of roses Lost in my sanctuary of plated posies Distorted perceptions of faces in blue Barriers of sealed ice I can see right through a divine life perceived in fate Echo's of little prayers immortally gyrate _____ -Rouge- Someone please hold me I look pretty when I cry Put me in a trance I am serene when I lie Inject me with poison I tremble when I bleed Transmit stirs of tranquil chaos and I will lead Wrists a canvas of cherry lust Little secrets hide behind heaps of disgust Tiny French faeries dance in my head Spinning and twirling soaring ribbons of red Crimson Angels draped in white Fallen upon glass of garnet A solitary rose left in the hands of a child Sweet kisses caress a forsaken prick Petals of ash crumble to the ground in exile -emaciation- when look at you I see the body of a child with every rib perfectly placed and defined I can count the vertebrae along your rickety spine your razor sharp shoulder blades could cut through ice while your size zeros collect at your spindly thighs ----- -SOS- I open my mouth to cry for help, but water fills my lungs while I quietly sink under. An urchin swims beside me, but I am not ready to be saved. I propel faster against the current. Watch and see how far down I go. slowly. another foot under the frigid tide. slowly. 70 feet. slowly. Crash to the ocean floor. -La Vita Allegra- My pulsating heart coincides to the rhythm of the drummer boy’s snare I walk a fine line between rationality and insanity I chose bones over morality, intricacy over simplicity. Who’s to say which is more substantial? Should I reach for the stars? Is the fallout of ambition everlasting bliss? Or shall I settle for integrity? "Forever Next To Me" Lets swing a bit higher If we're lucky we wont ever come down will you help me slow down please? My feet don't quite touch the ground Hold me in your arms Don't let my prom dress drag on the floor Lets fall asleep in a bed of roses Lay cut and bleeding from the thorns Chorus: Do you remember when you gave me that bottle filled with sand from the Caribbean sea? It shattered and landed on my pillow so at night you're forever in my dreams I put on my lipstick But you just wipe it off my face you say I don't need makeup Because I am beautiful any place Chorus: Do you remember when you gave me that bottle filled with sand from the Caribbean sea? It shattered and landed on my pillow so at night you're forever next to me Lets spin a bit faster if we're lucky we'll never stop But if I get tired will you catch me before I drop? Chorus: Do you remember when you gave me that bottle filled with sand from the Caribbean sea? It shattered and landed on my pillow so at night you're forever in my dreams (repeat chorus) -the gift- I wish someday I could sit down and write something so inspiring that it could change the world. I want to strip down to the bones until all that is left of me is the little star that defines me. I am going to be the next Fiona apple and I'm going to find someone who loves me. caffeine and deprivation are my weapons of choice. I've been given a gift so I'm gonna exercise this voice. ----- -lucent reality- She built up castle walls made of ice so cold not even the fiery pits of hell could melt them away. Fear fills the vacuoles of the iced barriers. Rejection resides in the attic. While Denial and Jealousy keep her company in the confines of the basement. The Cold-Hearted Queen rests upon a thrown of glass. Her eyes are depths of pure blue. A stream of velvet locks flow to the backs of her knees. Lucent skin stretched upon bones complement the chiffon of her dress. Spells of laughter nourish her body. Sacred melodies replenish her soul. One day her glass thrown will shatter beneath her fragile frame. The pale floors will be stained a scarlet red. Blood will soak the crystal barriers of her once unassailable asylum. These castle walls perish under the weight of mortality. "remember the stars" its been 36 hours since she last ate she feels great pain running on empty glitter shimmers through her veins (chorus) give up control trade in death for life and don't forget to look up and remember the stars She spends Sunday mornings sitting in coffee shops writing poetry on the backs of receipts detoxed from society graveyard shifts are spent in rest stop bathrooms carving scarlet gashes into her wrists (chorus) give up your razor blade trade in death for life and don't forget to look up and remember the stars she starts to come down feeling broken again turns up the music loud screams, "I need you" drowned out by the sound (chorus) pour out your powder trade in death for life and don't forget to look up and remember the stars   Tell them to remember hope Tell them to remember the stars (repeat to fade) remember the stars   -RAVENOUS- eyes wide open bone chilling pain soundless dizzy spells my mind's insane fingernails dug deep into pillows of down my stomach's a pit of nothing but a knot tightly bound slumber is veiled under an inept void my last morsel was consumed at noon grandfather strikes twelve half the battle is through insomnia lingers as I anticipate the sunrise my eyes grow heavy as I envision confection: candy canes, lollipops, caramels and cakes I unwrap a kiss and take to my lips for a moment I am sated and then I awake -eulogy- here she lies with an ivory rose between her brittle fingers I never quite understood her but she was good to me with every inch I got taller I watched her grow smaller (chorus) she was the lyrics to my melody her mind never at ease so now she rests in peace when I got pushed around in her own special way she helped me through I hid my box of secrets in the closet but she knew (chorus) she was the lyrics to my melody her mind never at ease so now she rests in peace (repeat x2) ------ -unsound- I hate the shade. I hate the cold. I fear the night. dizziness. pixies. cinnamon swirls. cinnamon toast. cinnamon crunch. sugar sweet. swollen belly. swollen chest. pounding skull. icy fingers. safe in the garden. I am protected. ---- “I don’t deserve you” They say you can lose yourself In this underground portal to hell Called Hollywood But I’m already so far gone It wouldn’t matter anyway My slight frame collapses Under the pressure of this stifling heat I want to watch all the blood Drain from my veins I want to feel my flesh explode (chorus) I can never love you if I don’t love myself I can only paint a picture With words to describe to you the way I feel I don’t deserve you I don’t deserve you I am unfit I can no longer tend to this garden frosted posies seep back into the soil gilded sunflowers are wilting away I am a walking night terror in the eyes of these beholders emerald poison in their souls, Shooting back venom with their eyes (chorus) I can never love you if I don’t love myself I can only paint a picture With words to describe to you the way I feel I don’t deserve you I don’t deserve you I am never comfortable which is why I am always changing I am being held captive in my own body But this body is nothing but a suit of armor I don’t deserve you I don’t deserve you ---- we grasp onto any piece of familiarity we can get a hold of. like the feeling of wet moss growing on a rock on your bare feet. slippery and unsafe. jaw to pavement. face to water. inhaling water. --- her slight frame walks out of the coffee shop for the second time today. she's one of them. ---- goodbye to sanity. welcome to the wrapped up world of light headed autumn air. --- I am a walking night terror in the eyes of these beholders. --- dolly's flesh is swelling. dolly's flesh is swollen. dolly's heart is pounding. dolly's head is spinning. dolly's bones are breaking. dolly fell apart. --- emerald poison in their souls, shooting back venom with their eyes. --- keep dolly on a shelf with teddy, and dolly will maintain. Throw her to the bears unready, and dolly will be slain. --- I used to wonder what separated children from adults, but now I know. It is thoughts of hopelessness, and fear of not finding a place in this world. It is the close-mindedness and the fear of not finding something worthy to live for. --- the scent of autumn air is right around the corner. spices of cinnamon and pumpkin fill the air. The iridescent cobwebs are forming in the corners of front porches. --- --- we as individuals are constantly evolving. we are only a glimpse of our former selves. --- I want to watch all the blood drain from my veins. I want to feel my flesh explode. --- I am unfit. I can no longer tend to this garden. frosted posies seep back into the soil gilded sunflowers are wilting away --- I am never comfortable. which is why I am always changing. --- she carries around a bag that is bigger than her. she wears red heart-shaped glasses. she is not like the others. uniqueness is unacceptable where she stays. but standing out is what makes her special. --- I embrace my uniqueness. I live my life the way I want. I feed off their stunned faces. I love being the only one of my kind. I think I may be okay here- and that scares me. --- I am going to try to get as close to perfection as I possibly can. These idle hands will no longer wander. consider these gaps of idle time to be filled. --- we live in gingerbread houses in the city of London with our rainbow colored goldfish and a Dalmatian named jelly. --- --- we are sitting around, trying to waste time because we have nothing to look forward to. we are bored as hell. wondering what to do with the rest of our lives. --- I can only paint a picture with words to describe to you the way I feel. --- a slight frame collapses under the pressure of the stifling heat. --- post comment

My inner wisdom will save me. [24 Feb 2007|01:34am] lately I have been preoccupied with the fact that I am alone in this world. but now I realize that there is no reason to dwell. I don't need anybody in this world. I can live on my own. No strings attached. from now on whenever I hit rock bottom I am just going to write a song about it. I found unconditional love; music. I am still unsure where I want to go with my life. I need some motivation. and inspiration. I think I need to take a trip. to anywhere. I need a new outlook on life. I need to see things in a new perspective. I need a revelation. I had a small one today, but I need something bigger. Lets see here...I love music. I like to write. I like to travel. I am fascinated with the well being of the human anatomy. and then theres that whole fame thing. huh. there must be something I can do with my life that combines all my interests..but what? a singing pop sensation? maybe. or possibly I can run my own little boutique or cafe in san fran. or I can work in a hospital as a nutritionist or therapist. I do like helping people. there are so many options. I just don't know where to begin. post comment

[24 Feb 2007|12:05am] today I saw, "music and lyrics" with my mom and joseph. It kind of inspired me to get back into writing music. Its just what I needed. 1 comment|post comment

[29 Jun 2005|03:23am] 9 comments|post comment

navigation [ viewing | most recent entries ]